this is the story of a gurl…

i cant continue with the the quitting smoking campaign tt i promised to make it as a continuos publish in my blog at this very moment. buzy + illness prob + personal unanswered difficulties arise simultaneously, but i promise myself to continue about it later.insyaAllah…

lately, i’ve got new finding. penemuan baru yg aku baru tau n realize. SESAKIT2 MANA PON HEART BROKEN TUH, LEBIH SAKIT LAGI BILA KENE HEART BURN! i thought myself tt heart broken is pain enough, coz it unconsciously made myself loss my appetite n reduce in weight. tapi rupa2nya, heart burn nih lagi sakit, sebab u have the appetite to eat (as tt is wut my trademark= kuat makan), but then the disease just forcefully MAKE Me NOT TO EAT! arghh.. sengsara gila. sakitnya hanya tuhan yg tau. rasa terbakar dalam badan, n lagi2 bila nak telan food. n rite now i really FORCEFULLY have to diet. tiap2 ari makan sup n bubur aje.tuh pon still sakit thap cipan. n tragisnya i have to sleep ala2 duduk sbb tanak acid from my stomach reflux to my esophagus. abis sakiy2 badan aku bila g klas. dlm ati mmg cakap padan muka jer. tuhla, dulu nak sgt diet. ha, amik kau. kali nih mmg kene diet btol2.

i visited the doctor again yesterday. sbb dah tak tahan sgt coz i’ve suffering this nearly 1 week. bila gi klinik pakar uia tuh, tiba2 si nurse nih cakap tadek general doctor petang tuh. yg ada pakar kulit jer. then the nurse ask me sakit apa. cakapla sakit dada. boleh tahan tak? tak tahan dah. ada sejarah keluarga kene sakit jantung ker? arrr.. aderla atuk meninggal sbb sakit jantung. pup! teros si nurse tuh capai tepon n call dR Syamsul soh dtg emergency case. dalam ati aku, gila apa nurse nih. dia igt aku kene angina pectoris because of cardiac prob ker? gila! kalo aku kene betol2 camner?

then tak sampai 10 min Dr Syamsul tros dtg. n nurse tuh smangat temankan aku coz dia kata maybe nti awak kene wat ECG. (wut! nurse nih mmg btol igt aku ada cardiac prob nih.. aiseh3…)when i clarify eveything to the dR, dia siap buat2 lawak lagi. n continously trying to make me smile n laugh. n konklusinya, i’ve got this disease because of STRESS! (wut? am i?) he said i dun fill in all the criterias to get this gastro-esophageal reflux disease (GERD), but there’s only 1 n only possiblity. stress. aku macam ternganga2 jugak, coz when i’m hvg this ‘cobaan’, i was in a normal n happy condition. but the doctor keep believing tt i am stress, subconsciously. ada ke dia tanya, awak putus cinta eh? takpon, ada bf awak cakap yg wat awak terasa. biasala, pompuan nih kadang2 sensetip sgt. takpon awak ader minat sorg nih sgt2, tapi awak tak cakap kat dia. aku mmg bantai gelak je la bila dgr. merepek btol dR nih.bercinta pon tak tiba2 nak putus dah. last2 i’ve got prescription from him ; keep smiling walo susah n sakit mana pon prob aku, dun stress, rajin2 call family, PERGI BERCUTI (hehe..idea yg best), n lastly identify urself the source of ur stress. sbb tuhla aku telan ubat berpapan2 pon tak jalan sbb punca utamanya tak heal.

after hvg this conversation with him, aku pon cuba2 pk. am i stress? napa aku tak prasan. then baru tringat psycho yg Dr Umeed br ajar. we as human nih mmg ada ego-defence mechanism masing2. n one of the type yg aku tgh buat nih =DENIAL.(when i’m upset, i remind myself tt everything is really okay). i was success lying at myself b4, tapi agaknya badan aku dah tak tahan sgt dgn tahap kehipokritan aku nih. so here i am, hvg dis disease. sian my body. i’m torturing myself. then br now i dpt jumpa 1 persatu bukti yg i’am stress. i really want to be a gud Dr, n tt phrase tt i always bear in mind make me feel so deeply stress. aku bgg ngan abg cafe sbb slalu bagi aku harga mahal (smpai tak perasannya 1 day nih aku termarah dia). aku bgg bila org tak paham apa yg aku rasa, aku bgg sbb aku tak rajin, i upset with my study, n i’m upset with so many things tt i was reluctantly to admit b4. phew.. no wonder for this block, shopping doesnt seem like the best treatment anymore, n watching Grey’s Anat didn’t help to lift up my spirit at all.. the problem is me…

ok!so have to follow dR prescription. Smile! n bercuti. hehe.. nak balik umah ujung minggu nih, n if possible nak pujuk akak tgk wayang sesama. then tanak bawak langsung buku time balik nih, nak enjoy abis2. nak beli komik shin chan n nak stop kejap beli majalah2 kesihatan. erm.. btol cakap iman. i’m living my life as med student. n tt’s make my body tired so much. just need some times to act like me b4.hehe..ok2. let start the new chapter! =)

to begin, aku tak rasa org yg merokok nih tatau yg merokok nih bahaya. U dun need a scientist or even an Enstein to know the fact tt it is bahaya. Pembetulan. SANGAT BAHAYA. When my abg sedara beriya2 nak tgk gambar paru2 org merokok. I just said ‘tak payah nak tgkla sebb mestila terok’. But as he insist to see, n said tt he wanted to see the evidence, fine.

Actually ,smoking can harm ur body in many different ways. It DAMAGES THE IMMUNE SYSTEM & INCREASE THE RISK OF INFECTION. Kebiasaannya, smokers nih lagi senang nak sakit drpd org yg tak smoking. & when smokers ni sakit, penyakit tuh akan stay lebih lama to compere with the non-smokers. Yela, sbb dh kacau immune system kan. Tt’s why smokers ni more likely to require longer hospitalization than nonsmokers. Duduk lama2 kat hospital ni kan sama maknanya dgn lagi byk duit kene bayar. Lagipon dok sepital bukan best pon. gloomy je aku tgk…

Besides tt, smokers hv greater risk of complication & lower survival rate after surgery becoz of damage to the body defence. Nih bukan saja2 nak takutkan tau (walaupon mmg patut kene takut pun), but this is nothing except the fact. They r also at increased risk of infections, pneumonia (infection dkt paru2) & other complication of respiratory. Bende2 nih biasa jd, sbb tak semestinya after operation, u’ll be totally fine. Coz sometimes, u’ll get another sakit becoz of infection after operation ( not too sterile kot while doing it). Tuh tak termasuk lagi kalo ader kes tertinggal kain dalam abdomen time operation tuh. Hehe…

Ok2. maybe u can say tt ‘ala. Xpela. Bukannya ade involve dlm mana2 operation pon. So sakit yg kat atas nih dh terlepas la..’ ok.. but u cant escape this 1. Bila kita nih makin tua, tulang kita akan jadi semakin kurg tumpat which can lead to greater risk utk dpt hip fracture (kira retakla…) tapi malangnya, tulang smokers nih tends to be lower dense than any other nonsmokers. Maksudnya lagi sngla nak retak dr org biasa nih

Nak minum susu anelene supaya tulang boleh dense? Erm.. maybe it’s a gud idea, but how far can u run? Tulang retak tuh baru problem yg ciput jer. Tapi yg paling problemnya islah smoking nih boleh sbbkan peripheral artery disease. Maksudnya perjalanan darah ke seluruh badan nih terjejas. Nak tau sebab apa? Sebab, dahla salur darah kita nih (artery) sedia ader kecik. Then, disempitkan lagi dgn mendapan2 nih kat wall dia. Jadila Atherosclerosis. Sebenarnya artherosclerosis nih maksudnya mendapan kat wall artery, contain fibrous ngan fat. Bila smoking, oxidative reagent dr smoke tuh akan menggalakkan lagi pemendapan 2 benda alah nih. mmg sgt bahaya! Atherosclerosis nih kalo ada kat artery dekat jantung, boleh kene heart attack (atau perkataan fevretnya myocardial infact), n kalo kene kat artery kat otak boleh kena stroke (cerebellum infarct), which biasanya end dgn koma. X tragik ke?

Bende yg paling last aku nk sebut (walaupon health effect dia sbenarnya byk mcm shopping list), smoking nih causes many types of cancer. Sebenarnya dulu, cancer adalah first disease linked to smoking. Tt’s why biasa kita dgr smoker thp kritakal will eventually end up with cancer paru2.

Aku rasa elokla stop dulu. Kalo nak habiskan sumanya, mau aku tertidur depan lattop nih. But btw, baru aku teringat utk mengingatkan. Utk pompuan yg pregnant, kalo dia merokok mmg sgt2 menyumbang utk gugur or dapat anak tak cukup sifat. Tapi bukan kalo mak je yg merokok jadik camtuh. Kalo papa nya g merokok pon boleh bg effect yg sama. Actually, 2nd hand smoker (atau nama lain, passive smoker  org skeliling perokok) have also great possibility to get the health problem listed above. Heh.. tt’s why when smokers r around me, i will tutup my hidung , atau paling2 kesian palingkan muka. Lantakla kalo smokers to rasa apa. I dun give a damn of wut he/she might think. Erm… always find tt smoke is soo irritating. Hey. Kalo nak bunuh diri sendri, jgn nak libatkan org lain sekali tau. Berdosa.

P/s: there’s also reports tt smoking nih tend to make u infertile (mandul).coz dia ada give effect ngan sperm punya development. hermmm.. still thinking to keep puffing? Bettter think back more than twice